Chicken Tikka Jojo Tacos (or why i'm never eating curry again)

So my move since Thursday has been pretty awesome, all things considered.  Went to a party the night i moved with Jesse, to celebrate the birthday of his friend Jeff.  Met amazing people, one in particular named Beth that i talked to for an extended time.  Had one of those moments where you realize that if things had stayed the same I never would be having that conversation or would have ever met that person...and am so grateful.  Those moments happen alot now, however I have been quite disappointed with how self absorbed I have been.  I just haven't given my friends and family the attention and updates they deserve, and find it really easy to involve myself in my new experiences. I didn't even talk to either of my sisters to wish them a Happy New Year and that disappoints me.

On the other hand, karmic retribution hit me today as I experienced my first day navigating my new professional world.  I needed to be humbled, because perhaps my ego felt so empowered by my move that it needed to be reminded that there's always room for acceptance and growth.  Last night i could barely sleep with all the anxiety of starting training for my new job.  I woke up every 15 minutes, with rotating thoughts of my new job interchanged with the abandonment of my special people as mentioned above.  I had printed out all my training documents last wedensday, and pored over them last night in preparation.  OK i was clear the class started at 830am at the Murray Business Park in Beaverton. As the clock was ticking I kept flagging down people in the hall to help me find the training rooms.  No luck.  As one of the Providence nuns (Sister Maggie) looked at my paperwork it became clear that perhaps I was in the wrong part of town ENTIRELY.  UUGGHHHHH

After help from the receptionist in the building, who didn't have any classes on record until Jan 13th, I had to call Jesse to come back and get me.  Already having a few years fall down my cheeks, he told me to go immediately into the bathroom and get my shit together because this was not the impression I wanted to give my new employers.  And thank goodness because i did just that.  I had called my boss this morning before i even left, to confirm, but she wasn't back in the office until tomorrow (Tues).  But someone at the office called her at home and she immediately called me back.  Turns out I was to be at St. Vincents Hospital (which none of the paperwork even mentioned.)  I made it there at 930am.  Not only had the class already started at 8am, with everyone enjoying breakfast together, the entire room of at least 50 people (doctors, nurses, everyone hired within the last few weeks) was facing the door I came into, sheepishly trying to find an empty seat while the room full of people stared at me and wondered why I was such a late, lazy loser.

I found a seat and took my coat off....and i was sitting there and started smelling something so foreign to me.  I smelled like some mix of B.O. and it made no sense.  Until i realized that the sweater I was wearing had been worn on saturday night, when jesse filled the house with the delicious scent of chicken curry that he so generously made Miranda and I.  I smelled like curry.  Which is really conspicuous when you're sitting THAT close to so many people.  And i have a poor sense of smell, so imagine what that was like for normal smelling people.  ARRRRGH

I then had to sit for the next 3 hours with no break, literally falling asleep because i had gotten so little sleep and had woken up much earlier than i am used to.  It was literally the most boring information about the history of the hospital (which i will remind you this is a new employee orientation, even though i've worked at this hospital for 3 years and already had one.) Not only was I smelling like curry, I could not stop my eyes from fading and noding off. THEN.....a woman came in with a HARP.  Yes there is some wonderful Palliative Care music programs going on, but with lunch an hour away and fading swiftly, harp music was quite literally the last thing I needed at that particular moment.  BLAAARRRG

The afternoon was alright, they served us sandwiches and I got to chat with a dear friend to help me cope. But by the end of the day, I felt so alienated, so conspicuous, so incredibly the opposite of what I want to believe I am that I finally just cried once I was on my way home.  Hey, i had held it in for the whole day so at least no one saw it but Miranda.  She is becoming such a trusted, lovely source of friendship and inspiration. (That is Jesse's girlfriend, we love her.)

SO at least i got to end the evening by hanging out with 3 of my favorite people.  Even Lisa and Jesse had a heinous day today as well, so we all commiserated and made each other laugh, and I was glad Lisa came and met up with us.  Went to a place called the Gold Dust Meridian on Hawthorne.  Very excellent food.  It's gonna be hard not to gain 100 lbs here.

Tomorrow is a half day so I am very grateful for that right about now.  Had an awesome New Years and the preceding and following days were no less wonderful, so i'm quite content.  And going to bed now, since my wake up call is at 4am. booooooooooooo

Hope you all are well, and finding contentedness in this New Year.